king-in-yellow:

hopephd:

Seizure First Aid. 

Learn it. Share it. Know it. Use it. 

100% correct medical information on tumblr for once; also consider calling 911 if you don’t know how often the person has seizures and ESPECIALLY if the seizure has lasted 5 minutes or more (which is why the watch is critical)

dilapidatedragamuffin:

Can we talk about Spy Kids 3 for a second because it’s just the MOST BAFFLING CINEMATIC EXPERIENCE EVER

First we open to LITTLE BABY SELENA GOMEZ

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THE PRESIDENT IS GEORGE CLOONEY?

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Later we see Juni’s grandpa who is KHAN??

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who spends the whole movie…

kadabbs:

Recent studies confirm that reading books and drinking tea doesn’t make you better than anyone else

fagsindubai:

qualities i look for in a man

fagsindubai:

qualities i look for in a man

robotmango:

gooqueen:

every year after you turn 17 you get further away from being the age of the dancing queen and that’s my least favorite thing about growing up

ah but when you turn 34 you’re two dancing queens and thus having twice the time of your life. and at 51 you become the dancing triumvirate and three golden crowns are forged in your honor

lots to look forward to

i-said-adventure:

penice:

penice:

I was addicted to soap once

I’m clean now

STOP

auntytany:

lostbeasts:

i will forever be dumbfounded by the SHEER SIZES of some prehistoric animals i mean

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holy

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friggin

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shit

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i still think HORSES are big but

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would you

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just

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cOULD YOU IMAGINE

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FUCK

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kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails
refreshes:

lamelohan:

oh my GOD

CHILL

refreshes:

lamelohan:

oh my GOD

CHILL

whatheballs:

This article is great because that author tried to put in as many dick jokes that he possibly could.